Lesson 38 Explore 4: I Want to Die—Can the Bible Help Me When I Have Suicidal Thoughts?
The Bible’s answer
Yes! The Bible comes from “God, who comforts those who are downhearted.”
(2 Corinthians 7.6: But God, who comforts those who are downhearted, comforted us by the presence of Titus;)
Although the Bible is not a mental-health textbook, it has helped many overcome suicidal thoughts. Its practical advice can help you too.
What practical advice does the Bible give?
Does the Bible tell us about people who wanted to die?
Which Bible verses can help you resist suicidal thoughts?
What if a friend says, “I want to die”?
What if I have attempted suicide in the past?
What practical advice does the Bible give?
Express your feelings. What the Bible says: “A true friend shows love at all times, and is a brother who is born for times of distress.”-
(Proverbs 17.17: A true friend shows love at all times And is a brother who is born for times of distress.)
Meaning: We need the support of others when we have distressing thoughts. If you keep your feelings to yourself, you carry a burden that can become unbearable. But if you share your feelings, you may lessen their intensity and even gain a fresh perspective. Try this: Talk to someone today, perhaps a family member or a trusted friend. You might also express yourself by writing down your feelings.
Express your feelings.
Get professional help. What the Bible says: “Healthy people do not need a physician, but those who are ill do.”-
(Matthew 9.12: Hearing them, he said: “Healthy people do not need a physician, but those who are ill do.)
Meaning: We should seek medical help when we are ill. Suicidal thoughts may be a symptom of mental or emotional illness. Like physical sickness, this is nothing to be ashamed of. Mental and emotional illnesses can be treated. Try this: Seek help from a qualified physician as soon as possible.
Get professional help.
Remember that God cares. What the Bible says: “Five sparrows sell for two coins of small value, do they not? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God.... Have no fear; you are worth more than many sparrows.”-
(Luke 12.6, 7: Five sparrows sell for two coins of small value, do they not? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Have no fear; you are worth more than many sparrows.)
Meaning: You are precious to God. You may feel all alone, but God sees what you are going through. He cares about you-even if you have lost your will to live. “A heart broken and crushed, O God, you will not reject,” says
(Psalm 51.17: The sacrifices pleasing to God are a broken spirit; A heart broken and crushed, O God, you will not reject.)
God wants you to live because he loves you. Try this: Examine evidence from the Bible that God loves you. For example, see chapter 24 of the Bible study aid Draw Close to Jehovah.
Remember that God cares.
Pray to God. What the Bible says: “Throw all your anxiety on [God], because he cares for you.”-
(1 Peter 5.7: while you throw all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you.)
Meaning: God invites you to tell him openly and honestly about whatever weighs on your mind. God can give you both inner peace and the strength to keep going.
(Philippians 4.6, 7: Do not be anxious over anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication along with thanksgiving, let your petitions be made known to God; and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your mental powers by means of Christ Jesus.)
(Philippians 4.13: For all things I have the strength through the one who gives me power.)
In this way, he sustains those who call out to him with a sincere heart.-
(Psalm 55.22: Throw your burden on Jehovah, And he will sustain you. Never will he allow the righteous one to fall.)
Try this: Pray to God today. Use his name, Jehovah, and tell him about your feelings.
(Psalm 83.18: May people know that you, whose name is Jehovah, You alone are the Most High over all the earth.)
Ask him to help you keep going.
Pray to God.
Meditate on the Bible’s hope for the future. What the Bible says: “We have this hope as an anchor for our lives, both sure and firm.”- footnote. Meaning: Your emotions may go up and down like a ship in a storm, but the hope held out by the Bible can stabilize you. That hope is not wishful thinking but is based on God’s promise to remove the causes of our pain.-
(Hebrews 6.19: We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, both sure and firm, and it enters in within the curtain,)
(Revelation 21.4: And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.”)
Try this: Learn more about the Bible’s hope by reading the article “A Real Hope for a Better Tomorrow.”
Meditate on the Bible’s hope for the future.
Do something you enjoy. What the Bible says: “A joyful heart is good medicine.”-
(Proverbs 17.22: A joyful heart is good medicine, But a crushed spirit saps one’s strength.)
Meaning: When we do things that bring us joy, we may improve our mental or emotional well-being. Try this: Do something that you normally enjoy. For example, listen to uplifting music, read something encouraging, or pursue a hobby. You will also increase your happiness if you do something to help others, even in small ways.-
(Acts 20.35: I have shown you in all things that by working hard in this way, you must assist those who are weak and must keep in mind the words of the Lord Jesus, when he himself said: ‘There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving.’”)
Do something you enjoy.
Take care of your physical health. What the Bible says: “Physical training is beneficial.”-
(1 Timothy 4.8: For physical training is beneficial for a little, but godly devotion is beneficial for all things, as it holds promise of the life now and the life that is to come.)
Meaning: We benefit when we exercise, get adequate sleep, and eat healthful food. Try this: Go for a brisk walk, even for just 15 minutes.
Take care of your physical health.
Remember that feelings and other things in life change. What the Bible says: “You do not know what your life will be like tomorrow.”-
(James 4.14: whereas you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. For you are a mist that appears for a little while and then disappears.)
Meaning: A distressing problem-even one that seems beyond your control-may well be temporary. No matter how bleak your situation seems today, it can change tomorrow. So look for ways to cope.
(2 Corinthians 4.8: We are hard-pressed in every way, but not cramped beyond movement; we are perplexed, but not absolutely with no way out;)
Your distressing situation will likely change in time, but you cannot undo suicide. Try this: Read Bible accounts about people who felt so discouraged that they wanted to die, and see how their life eventually changed for the better-often in ways that they could not have foreseen. Consider some examples.
Remember that feelings and other things in life change.
Does the Bible tell us about people who wanted to die?
Yes. The Bible tells us about some who said, in effect, “I want to die.” God did not rebuke them, but offered them help. He can do the same for you.
Elijah
Who was he? Elijah was a brave prophet. But he was not immune to discouragement. “Elijah was a man with feelings like ours,” says
(James 5.17: Elijah was a man with feelings like ours, and yet when he prayed earnestly for it not to rain, it did not rain on the land for three years and six months.)
Why did he want to die? At one point, Elijah felt alone, afraid, and worthless. So he begged: “Jehovah, take my life away.”-
(1 Kings 19.4: He went a day’s journey into the wilderness and came and sat down under a broom tree, and he asked that he might die. He said: “It is enough! Now, O Jehovah, take my life away, for I am no better than my forefathers.”)
What helped him? Elijah poured out his feelings to God. How did God encourage him? God showed him concern and gave him a demonstration of His power. He also assured Elijah that he was still needed and gave Elijah a caring and capable assistant.
Read about Elijah:
(1 Kings 19.2-18: At that Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying: “So may the gods do to me and add to it if by this time tomorrow I do not make you like each one of them!” At that he became afraid, so he got up and ran for his life. He came to Beer-sheba, which belongs to Judah, and he left his attendant there. He went a day’s journey into the wilderness and came and sat down under a broom tree, and he asked that he might die. He said: “It is enough! Now, O Jehovah, take my life away, for I am no better than my forefathers.” Then he lay down and fell asleep under the broom tree. But suddenly an angel touched him and said to him: “Get up and eat.” When he looked, there at his head was a round loaf on heated stones and a jug of water. He ate and drank and lay down again. Later the angel of Jehovah came back a second time and touched him and said: “Get up and eat, for the journey will be too much for you.” So he got up and ate and drank, and in the strength of that nourishment he went on for 40 days and 40 nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of the true God. There he entered a cave and spent the night; and look! Jehovah’s word came to him, telling him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?” To this he said: “I have been absolutely zealous for Jehovah the God of armies; for the people of Israel have forsaken your covenant, your altars they have torn down, and your prophets they have killed with the sword, and I am the only one left. Now they are seeking to take my life away.” But He said: “Go out and stand on the mountain before Jehovah.” And look! Jehovah was passing by, and a great and strong wind was splitting mountains and breaking crags before Jehovah, but Jehovah was not in the wind. After the wind, there was an earthquake, but Jehovah was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake, there was a fire, but Jehovah was not in the fire. After the fire, there was a calm, low voice. As soon as Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his official garment and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave. Then a voice asked him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?” To this he said: “I have been absolutely zealous for Jehovah the God of armies; for the people of Israel have forsaken your covenant, your altars they have torn down, and your prophets they have killed with the sword, and I am the only one left. Now they are seeking to take my life away.” Jehovah said to him: “Return, and go to the wilderness of Damascus. When you arrive, anoint Hazael as king over Syria. And you should anoint Jehu the grandson of Nimshi as king over Israel, and you should anoint Elisha the son of Shaphat from Abel-meholah as prophet to take your place. Anyone escaping from Hazael’s sword, Jehu will put to death; and anyone escaping from Jehu’s sword, Elisha will put to death. And I still have left 7,000 in Israel, all whose knees have not bent down to Baal and whose mouths have not kissed him.”)
Job
Who was he? Job was a wealthy family man who faithfully worshipped the true God.
Why did he want to die? Job’s life took a major turn for the worse. He lost all his possessions. All of his children died in a disaster. He got an agonizing disease. And finally, he was cruelly and falsely accused of causing his own problems. Job said: “I loathe my life; I do not want to go on living.”-
(Job 7.16: I loathe my life; I do not want to go on living. Leave me alone, for my days are like a breath.)
What helped him? Job prayed to God and talked to others.
(Job 10.1-3: “I loathe my life. I will give vent to my complaints. I will speak out in my bitter distress! I will say to God: ‘Do not pronounce me guilty. Tell me why you are contending with me. Does it benefit you to oppress, To despise the work of your hands While you favor the advice of the wicked?)
He was encouraged by a compassionate friend, Elihu, who helped him put his situation in perspective. Above all, Job welcomed God’s counsel and help.
Read about Job:
(Job 1.1-3: There was a man in the land of Uz whose name was Job. He was an upright man of integrity; he feared God and shunned what was bad. Seven sons and three daughters were born to him. His livestock amounted to 7,000 sheep, 3,000 camels, 1,000 cattle, and 500 donkeys, along with a very large number of servants, so that he became the greatest of all the people of the East.)
(Job 1.13-22: Now on the day when his sons and daughters were eating and drinking wine in their oldest brother’s house, a messenger came to Job and said: “The cattle were plowing and the donkeys were grazing beside them when the Sabeans attacked and took them, and they killed the servants with the sword. I am the only one who escaped to tell you.” While he was still speaking, another one came and said: “Fire from God fell from the heavens and blazed among the sheep and the servants and consumed them! I am the only one who escaped to tell you.” While he was still speaking, another one came and said: “The Chaldeans formed three bands and made a raid on the camels and took them, and they killed the servants with the sword. I am the only one who escaped to tell you.” While he was still speaking, yet another one came and said: “Your sons and your daughters were eating and drinking wine in their oldest brother’s house. Suddenly a great wind came from the wilderness, and it struck the four corners of the house, so that it fell on the young people and they were killed. I am the only one who escaped to tell you.” At that Job got up and ripped apart his garment and cut the hair off his head; then he fell to the ground and bowed down and said: “Naked I came out of my mother’s womb, And naked I will return. Jehovah has given, and Jehovah has taken away. Let the name of Jehovah continue to be praised.” In all of this, Job did not sin or accuse God of doing anything wrong.)
(Job 2.7: So Satan went out from the presence of Jehovah and struck Job with painful boils from the sole of his foot to the crown of his head.)
(Job 3.1-13: It was after this that Job began to speak and to curse the day of his birth. Job said: “Let the day perish on which I was born, Also the night when someone said: ‘A man has been conceived!’ Let that day be darkness. Let God above show no concern for it; Let no light shine upon it. Let the deepest darkness reclaim it. Let a rain cloud settle over it. Let whatever darkens the day terrify it. That night—let the gloom seize it; Let it not rejoice among the days of a year, And let it not enter among the number of the months. Indeed! Let that night become barren; Let no joyful cry be heard in it. Let those who curse the day put a curse on it, Those who are able to awaken Leviathan. Let the stars of its twilight grow dark; Let it wait in vain for daylight, And let it not see the rays of dawn. For it did not close the doors of my mother’s womb; Nor did it hide trouble from my eyes. Why did I not die at birth? Why did I not perish when I came from the womb? Why were there knees to receive me And breasts to nurse me? For now I would be lying down undisturbed; I would be sleeping and at rest)
(Job 36.1-7: Elihu continued: “Be patient with me a little longer while I explain, For I still have words to speak on God’s behalf. I will speak comprehensively about what I know, And I will ascribe righteousness to my Maker. Truly my words are not false; The One perfect in knowledge is here before you. Indeed, God is mighty and rejects no one; He is great in his power of understanding. He will not preserve the lives of the wicked, But he gives justice to the afflicted. He does not take his eyes off the righteous; He enthrones them with kings, and they are exalted forever.)
(Job 38.1-3: Then Jehovah answered Job out of the windstorm: “Who is this who is obscuring my counsel And speaking without knowledge? Brace yourself, please, like a man; I will question you, and you inform me.)
(Job 42.1, 2: Then Job said in reply to Jehovah: “Now I know that you are able to do all things And that nothing you have in mind to do is impossible for you.)
(Job 42.10-13: After Job had prayed for his companions, Jehovah removed Job’s tribulation and restored his prosperity. Jehovah gave him double what he had before. All his brothers and sisters and all his former friends came to him and ate a meal with him in his house. They sympathized with him and comforted him over all the calamity that Jehovah had allowed to come upon him. Each of them gave him a piece of money and a gold ring. So Jehovah blessed the last part of Job’s life more than the beginning, and Job came to have 14,000 sheep, 6,000 camels, 1,000 pairs of cattle, and 1,000 female donkeys. He also came to have seven more sons and three more daughters.)
Moses
Who was he? Moses was a leader of ancient Israel and a faithful prophet.
Why did he want to die? Moses had a huge workload, was constantly criticized, and felt worn out. So he cried out to God: “Please kill me right now.”-
(Numbers 11.11: Then Moses said to Jehovah: “Why have you afflicted your servant? Why have I not found favor in your eyes, so that you put the burden of all this people on me?)
(Numbers 11.15: If this is how you are going to treat me, please kill me right now. If I have found favor in your eyes, do not make me see any more calamity.”)
What helped him? Moses told God how he felt. God helped Moses lighten his workload to alleviate the stress.
Read about Moses:
(Numbers 11.4-6: The mixed crowd who were in their midst then expressed selfish longing, and the Israelites too began to weep again and say: “Who will give us meat to eat? How fondly we remember the fish that we used to eat without cost in Egypt, also the cucumbers, the watermelons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic! But now we are withering away. We see nothing at all except this manna.”)
(Numbers 11.10-17: Moses heard the people weeping, family after family, each man at the entrance of his tent. And Jehovah became very angry, and Moses was also very displeased. Then Moses said to Jehovah: “Why have you afflicted your servant? Why have I not found favor in your eyes, so that you put the burden of all this people on me? Did I conceive all this people? Did I give birth to them, so that you should tell me, ‘Carry them in your bosom, just as an attendant carries the nursing child,’ to the land that you swore to give to their forefathers? From where will I get meat to give to all this people? For they keep weeping before me, saying, ‘Give us meat to eat!’ I am not able to bear all this people by myself; it is too much for me. If this is how you are going to treat me, please kill me right now. If I have found favor in your eyes, do not make me see any more calamity.” Jehovah replied to Moses: “Gather for me 70 men from the elders of Israel, men whom you recognize as elders and officials of the people, and take them to the tent of meeting, and have them stand there with you. I will come down and speak with you there, and I will take away some of the spirit that is on you and place it on them, and they will help you in bearing the burden of the people so that you may not have to bear it alone.)
Which Bible verses can help you resist suicidal thoughts?
Verses that show God cares about you:
“Jehovah is close to the brokenhearted; he saves those who are crushed in spirit.”-
(Psalm 34.18: Jehovah is close to the brokenhearted; He saves those who are crushed in spirit.)
“When anxieties overwhelmed me, you comforted and soothed me.”-
(Psalm 94.19: When anxieties overwhelmed me, You comforted and soothed me.)
(See also )
(Psalm 27.10: Even if my own father and mother abandon me, Jehovah himself will take me in.)
(Psalm 103.12-14: As far off as the sunrise is from the sunset, So far off from us he has put our transgressions. As a father shows mercy to his sons, Jehovah has shown mercy to those who fear him. For he well knows how we are formed, Remembering that we are dust.)
(2 Corinthians 1.3, 4: Praised be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of tender mercies and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our trials so that we may be able to comfort others in any sort of trial with the comfort that we receive from God.)
Verses that show God understands your pain:
“You have seen my affliction; you are aware of my deep distress.”-
(Psalm 31.7: I will rejoice greatly in your loyal love, For you have seen my affliction; You are aware of my deep distress.)
“During all their distress it was distressing to him.... In his love and compassion..., he lifted them up.”-
(Isaiah 63.9: During all their distress it was distressing to him. And his own personal messenger saved them. In his love and compassion he repurchased them, And he lifted them up and carried them all the days of old.)
Verses that show God wants you to draw close to him and pour out your heart in prayer:
“Do not be anxious over anything, but in everything by prayer... let your petitions be made known to God; and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your mental powers.”-
(Philippians 4.6, 7: Do not be anxious over anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication along with thanksgiving, let your petitions be made known to God; and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your mental powers by means of Christ Jesus.)
“Draw close to God, and he will draw close to you.”-
(James 4.8: Draw close to God, and he will draw close to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you indecisive ones.)
(See also )
(Psalm 34.4: I inquired of Jehovah, and he answered me. He rescued me from all my fears.)
(Psalm 34.15: The eyes of Jehovah are on the righteous, And his ears listen to their cry for help.)
(Psalm 55.22: Throw your burden on Jehovah, And he will sustain you. Never will he allow the righteous one to fall.)
Verses that show God can give you strength:
“For all things I have the strength through the one who gives me power.”-
(Philippians 4.13: For all things I have the strength through the one who gives me power.)
“Do not be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be anxious, for I am your God. I will fortify you, yes, I will help you.”-
(Isaiah 41.10: Do not be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be anxious, for I am your God. I will fortify you, yes, I will help you, I will really hold on to you with my right hand of righteousness.’)
(See also )
(Psalm 138.3: On the day I called, you answered me; You made me bold and strong.)
(Isaiah 40.29-31: He gives power to the tired one And full might to those lacking strength. Boys will tire out and grow weary, And young men will stumble and fall, But those hoping in Jehovah will regain power. They will soar on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary; They will walk and not tire out.”)
What if a friend says, “I want to die”?
Take any mention of suicidal thoughts seriously. Encourage your friend to talk; draw him or her out.
(Proverbs 20.5: The thoughts of a man’s heart are like deep waters, But the discerning man draws them out.)
When people talk about their thoughts of suicide, they may be less likely to carry out the act.
Listen empathetically. “Be quick to listen, slow to speak.”
(James 1.19: Know this, my beloved brothers: Everyone must be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger,)
Understand that anguish or depression can drive a person to say things that are “wild talk.”
(Job 6.2, 3: “If only my anguish could be fully weighed And put on scales together with my calamity! For now it is heavier than the sands of the seas. That is why my words have been wild talk.)
So if a friend says something thoughtless or unkind, don’t overreact and take offense.
Speak consolingly. The Bible advises us: “Speak consolingly to those who are depressed.”
(1 Thessalonians 5.14: On the other hand, we urge you, brothers, to warn the disorderly, speak consolingly to those who are depressed, support the weak, be patient toward all.)
Do not minimize your friend’s feelings. Acknowledge his feelings and the reasons for them. Tell your friend how much he means to you.
Urge your friend to get help. “Wisdom belongs to those who seek advice,” says
(Proverbs 13.10: Presumptuousness leads only to strife, But wisdom belongs to those who seek advice.)
If your friend had a serious physical illness, you would encourage him to see a doctor. Suicidal thoughts can be a symptom of mental or emotional illness, so urge him to seek professional help. Even offer to go with him.
Show love. The Bible says: “A true friend shows love at all times, and is a brother who is born for times of distress.”
(Proverbs 17.17: A true friend shows love at all times And is a brother who is born for times of distress.)
You cannot erase your friend’s problems or suicidal thoughts. But by confirming your love for him and your support, you may help him through another day-and his next day may look brighter.
What if I have attempted suicide in the past?
Understandably, you may have feelings of guilt or shame. You may also feel that no one understands what led you to attempt suicide or the emotional anguish you may now be living with.
The Bible acknowledges that we cannot fully understand what others feel. “The heart knows its own bitterness,” says the Bible.
(Proverbs 14.10: The heart knows its own bitterness, And no outsider can share in its joy.)
(1 Kings 8.38: whatever prayer, whatever request for favor may be made by any man or by all your people Israel (for each one knows the plague of his own heart) when they spread out their hands toward this house,)
So while loved ones can offer a measure of comfort, they are somewhat limited. Be assured, however, that you are not alone.
God knows the human heart.
(2 Chronicles 6.30: then may you hear from the heavens, your dwelling place, and may you forgive; and reward each one according to all his ways, for you know his heart (you alone truly know the human heart),)
Jehovah knows what may have led you to feel that suicide was the only way out. He also understands your present feelings, which, as mentioned, may include guilt or shame.-
(Psalm 139.1: O Jehovah, you have searched through me, and you know me.)
While God highly values life, he is willing to forgive those who have had suicidal thoughts.
(Psalm 86.5: For you, O Jehovah, are good and ready to forgive; You abound in loyal love for all those who call on you.)
He knows that many who attempt suicide do not want to die-they just want to end their pain. So Jehovah can help, even if “our hearts may condemn us..., because God is greater than our hearts and knows all things.”
(1 John 3.19, 20: By this we will know that we originate with the truth, and we will assure our hearts before him regarding whatever our hearts may condemn us in, because God is greater than our hearts and knows all things.)
Yes, for you he wants to be “the Father of tender mercies and the God of all comfort.”-
(2 Corinthians 1.3: Praised be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of tender mercies and the God of all comfort,)
[End of article.]